My name is Debbi and I'm the grid girl for ....

[redshoes]

First of all apologies to anyone actually called Debbi. The names have been changed to protect the innocent. I didn't mention this after Knockhill as I assumed it would be a one-off but we had a repeat at Croft and who knows we may get another repeat at Oulton Park so just to warn everyone.

Picture the scene, it's just before the Knockhill sprint race and the cars are about to form up on the grid. Radio TOCA's intrepid pit-lane reporter, let's call him Alan, decides to work his way down the grid talking to each grid girl in turn. Not as you may think some subtle ruse to meet and speak to the girls, which would of course be totally out of character for Alan, but the set up for a very elaborate gag. Approaching the first girl Alan asks who she is. "Hello, I'm Debbi and I'm the grid girl for Jason Plato" comes the reply. This continues down the grid until we get to the punchline, a slightly out-of-place looking grid girl who says in a rather gruff voice, "Hello, my name's John B&Q and I'm the grid er.. person for Joanne Clarke".

Ok, so you all know the story behind that but the funniest bit was not the punchline but the responses from some of the other girls. Asked who they were the grid girl for, 5 or 6 replied "the AA.com". This led to the second funniest bit of the day with Alan desperately trying to pad and hoping no one had noticed.

Wind the clock forward a few weeks and we are now at Croft. No John B&Q this time but 'Brad' and 'Ricardo', the grid blokes for Annie and Jo. So off sets Alan again. Knockhill was a bit spur of the moment but this time the girls would have been briefed and fully rehearsed, so surely nothing could go wrong, right? Err no. The very first conversation went something like this:

Alan : Hello, who are you ?
Grid Girl : My name is Debbi
Alan : And who are you representing ?
Grid Girl : R L Modelling Agency
Alan :

From there things got no easier. We had grid girls for Jason Plateau and Mark Le'murr to name but two. Working down the grid the air of desperation in Alan's voice became more and more pronounced. You could almost hear him thinking 'should I continue with this or jump in front of this oncoming car'. By the way Alan, when you make those little asides after each girl remember that the mic is still on

I suspect the chances are pretty remote but please can we have another repeat performance at Oulton, it was the funniest thing I heard all weekend. Who knows, third time lucky ?