Oulton Park we need a volunteer fire marshall

John Batchelor · 17 Aug 2001, 17:50 (Ref:131805)

Ok at Oulton we will be short staffed, we need someone who is prepared to act as our fireman, best response gets the job.

Les · 17 Aug 2001, 18:00 (Ref:131808)

eeerrrr

yes please!

**Craig** · 17 Aug 2001, 18:00 (Ref:131809)

Does this involve putting out your wig next time you decide to light a fag from the barbeque ?!

Sorry mate - i'm pretty good at starting fires (long story...) but not so hot at putting them out...

marcus · 17 Aug 2001, 18:03 (Ref:131811)

ok ..hows this...fly me over from Australia ..put me up in 5 star accomodation , give me heaps of spending money and give me a drive in your car and I will glady do it.

come on im not asking for much

pb btcc · 17 Aug 2001, 18:11 (Ref:131813)

I would if i was going Oulton

.

John Batchelor · 17 Aug 2001, 19:01 (Ref:131838)

Craig.........you're not going tp let me forget that are you? be careful or we might put you in our "one size fits all fie marshal uniform"

**Craig** · 17 Aug 2001, 19:23 (Ref:131850)

Seeing as you put it like that, maybe I could let it go...!

Seriously, what does the job involve ? Do you need any qualifications apart from knowing how to use a fire extinguisher ?

redshoes · 17 Aug 2001, 19:51 (Ref:131856)

If it involved spraying neat BBQ lighter fluid everywhere then I can recomend someone perfect for the job. Not mentioning any names here of course. BTW Daz, how are you these days

John, what do you mean by "best response". If you would have said earlier we could have organised a competition. Complete in not more that 10 words, "I would like to be a B&Q fire marshal because ...."

John Batchelor · 17 Aug 2001, 20:00 (Ref:131859)

Sorry RS didn't know 'till today.......still time if you want to do it that way, however, I would have thought best response would normally mean....any female, aged 20-50, with a bit of a thing for an ageing racing driver/team owner (sad isn't it!!)

**bella** · 17 Aug 2001, 20:08 (Ref:131861)

there's quite a few in our number who are comfortable with fire

i do believe mr shoes mentioned one of them...

Lorna · 17 Aug 2001, 21:35 (Ref:131923)

Hehe. I am definitely up for this. I suppose "you name it, I'll do it" would just lead to trouble. How about pleeeeeaaaaseee!!! I am a responsible adult (when I want to be) and I haven't done anything like this ever before and I would love to do it and I fit into the 20-50 female category bit and I would love to do it and what training do I need and I would love to do it and it has been known that I do what I'm told and I would love to do it and I would love to do it and I would love to do it and I would love to do it and are these "one size fits all fire marshal uniforms flattering? (not that I'm being vane or anything)

redshoes · 17 Aug 2001, 21:43 (Ref:131934)

Lorna, I'm disappointed with you. John is quiet happy squeezing himself into a lycra AA catsuit and you're worried about how you'll look in overalls. You be wanting time to do your hair and make-up next.

Kelvin · 17 Aug 2001, 21:54 (Ref:131944)

I dont think they do my size firesuits do they John!!

Why not get a real fireman from local fire service, tie it in with some charity they might have, good publicity!!

Kelv.

Lorna · 17 Aug 2001, 22:46 (Ref:131961)

Of course I'll want to do my make up and hair! Silly!

Kelvin: Cor! Real Fireman! Can he wear his own uniform?!?!?!?

Kelvin · 17 Aug 2001, 22:55 (Ref:131966)

I can see we will have to hose you down Lorna!!

Kelv.

Minardi fan · 17 Aug 2001, 23:49 (Ref:131987)

Well I'm not female... and I'm not 20, yet... Ummm... I have however been told I look great in a lycra catsuit.

"I would like to be a B&Q fire marshal because it will prevent me from annoying Dan Eaves all weekend."

"Oh, and the rest of the grid too."

"Oh, and prevent me from embarrassing Nigel when annoying drivers."

Minardi fan · 17 Aug 2001, 23:53 (Ref:131989)

And does this job require good skills when handling a hose?

RIKB · 17 Aug 2001, 23:57 (Ref:131994)

John, I would give Lorna the Job if I were You....

You never know she might even write a " My day as John B&Q's fire Marshall" Article.

Les · 18 Aug 2001, 08:25 (Ref:132055)

My vote goes for Lorna - a definite article to be written there.

But Lorna - no airhorns in the pit lane and no jumping out in the feature race in front of an Astra just to wave hi!!

Lorna · 18 Aug 2001, 13:32 (Ref:132103)

Les, you are such a spoil sport

and Rik, you read my mind!

My pass arrived today for Oulton as well, John so you don't have to worry about that bit

Oh go on... please....... I promise to do as I'm told and I'll smile sweetly as well

Lorna · 18 Aug 2001, 13:38 (Ref:132106)

Quote:

Originally posted by Kelvin
I can see we will have to hose you down Lorna!!

Kelv.

btw - I had a reply to this but it's a family forum

**Craig** · 18 Aug 2001, 14:44 (Ref:132135)

Sorry Lorna, I have to vote for Minardi Fan - the reason will become apparent in a couple of weeks... John, check your email sir.

Lorna · 18 Aug 2001, 23:46 (Ref:132267)

Thanks for the vote of confidence Craig

Lovely insight into my personality - I received the cc email to John with pleasure

Hello "John SIR, baby" please, please please. I want to be Fireman Sam! (Samantha) I also promise not to use my hose for anything untoward.

BTW - did I mention i'm like the queen, I have two birthdays. But I am more special than the queen... I can decide when the second one is!

HeidiPops · 19 Aug 2001, 01:34 (Ref:132286)

My pledge goes to Loony Lorny, she is the bestest gal for the jobbie.
Is this a good time to mention she is a pyromaniac?

C'mon Craig get with the program!!

Les · 19 Aug 2001, 08:17 (Ref:132327)

Crikes a Lornykins fan club. Watch out John she'll be after a drive next.

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