Why did the chicken cross the road?

[Andy H]

Why did the chicken cross the road? We asked this traditional question to a whole load of Formula 1 personalities. As you'd expect from grand prix drivers and team managers, the answers were quite varied...

Mika Hakkinen: "Why did the chicken cross the road?" (pause) "that's tough question" (pause) "maybe" (pause) "er" (pause) "maybe it's a question you have to ask the chicken."

David Coulthard: "I was really surprised when the chicken swerved right in front of me and crossed the road. I was expecting it to walk straight along the pavement, but it just cut right across in front of me. I think we'll need a ruling from the FIA if chickens are allowed to do this."

Michael Schumacher: "The chicken is allowed to move over, that is clearly within the rules. The chicken can make one move to defend his line. But it can't zig-zag backwards and forwards across the road. What it did was quite fair and within the rules."

Ron Dennis: "The objective of the poultry individual in this situation is to work towards the goal of a road crossing. We're comfortable that that can be achieved using only bi-ped motional forces. We would refuse to compromise until a safe chicken arrival scenario had been achieved."

Alain Prost: "For sure the chicken crossed the road. But for me it was not as interesting as chickens crossing the road ten years ago."

Rubens Barrichello: " I'd like to dedicate the chicken crossing the road to my great friend Ayrton Senna"

Max Mosley: " We have to find ways of slowing that chicken down and making them safer. For that reason the FIA are changing the rules so that chickens crossing roads will be equipped with special chicken bodywork and neck supports."

Jacques Villeneuve: " So what if the f****** chicken gets run over. The chicken wanted to cross the road didn't it?"

James Allen (ITV pitlane reporter): "Hey guys, you're not going to believe this, but the chicken's on a different strategy to the bantams."

Murray Walker and Martin Brundle:
Murray: And as the lights go out, it's GO GO GO for the duck as it dives towards...
Martin: It's a chicken Murray.
Murray: Yes, yes, it's a chicken, charging into the lead. I think it's got this race sewn up.
Martin: The chicken's stopped, Murray
Murray: DISASTER for the chicken! This will throw the whole badger crossing championship wide open!

I must admit I didn't make it up myself just nicked it from somewhere else.

Any more folks?

[Valve Bounce]

Is it a free range chicken?
Is it an organic chicken free of steroids?
Will the chicken pass a drug test for the Sydney Olympics?
These important questions must be answered before the chicken's entry is accepted.

[Neil C]

Bernie: "I dont care if the chicken crosses the road, but it better not cross me!"

[marcus]

Pedro Diniz "So what ..there are plenty of chickens at my daddies supermarket"

david coulthard "when did Damon come out of retirement???"

[botsquad]

eddie irvine:

well he's been doing it all season hasn't he. he's dangerous and he's been told.

and i suppose he's going to keep on with in until something happens.

i just hope im not involved.

[Mr.S]

I'm surprised no one has taken the chickens perspective on this.

[Valve Bounce]

Stop squalking Mr. S, these chickens have enogh on their plates without worrying about crossing roads. Just don't count your bridges before your chickens are crossed.

[Minardi fan]

TGF: "The chicken crossed the road at that precise moment to deliberately to smack me from behind, feathers flying everywhere."

DC: "The chicken crossed the road to hold me up. He should have used the pelican crossing and let me pass. Och, it's a whole chicken conspiracy."

Jos: "The chicken, it just flew into the gravel."

Louise Goodman: "So Chicken, crossing the road again? Do you think you'll do anything different this season? "
Chicken: "Well I did one of them spins didn't I! Just flew into the road and that was it really."

Ukyo: "That's the seventh time this season my chicken has blown up."

[fastracer]

At the German Grand Prix

Todt: Hey chicken, do you want to make $50 right now?

Chicken: Really! How?

Todt: Just go out on the track and stop the race!

Chicken: Okay, but what if I get caught?

Todt: Uhhh.....Just say you work for Mercedes.

[downforce]

Luca Montezmelo..."If the Scuderia doesn't win both titles this year...we change our brand-identity...its simple...The Prancing Chicken!"

[Minardi fan]

Eddie Jordan today announced the new animal to replace the Buzzin' Hornet as the team's logo for 2001. He said: "We wanted something which encapsulated all things Jordan stand for, and so we chose a chicken."

The words Bantams and Hens will now be written on the car at non-tobacco sponsorship races.

[Ron Dennis's Mum]

Heheheheeh!!!

LOL

[Ralf's Girl]

I've had that F1 Chicken thing by e-mail. Gave me a good laugh...

[Fiorentina 1]

Comedy! The Barichello one was the best.

Here's 1 with Alesi:
"Well you know, zi geecken cross zi road to avoid zi Pedro Diniz..."

[Toth]

J Todt:"Our chickens are not as good as the opponents chickens and could therefore not cross the road. We are sure we will design a much better chicken over the winter and our chickens will definately cross the road next year."

And shades of Animal Farm...
R Dennis:"Our chickens are equal."
But the cubeheaded chicken thinks the Finnish chicken is treated more equal.

[Minardi fan]

Giancarlo Minardi: Our Argentinian pay-chicken offered us a year's supply of fresh eggs, thus allowing him to cross the road for us all season.

[Mr.S]

You call that road crossing!